Week One – Chapter One, Exercise Two

Chapter One, Exercise Two

Instructions: This exercise talked about how making a list of top leadership skills or managerial skills to learn. Then, for each skill, list a leader who would be a good role model for that particular activity.

  1. Skill: Speaking Up – I want to learn to speak up when I am not respected, and to speak up when something I see is wrong. I got to reclaim that time!
    1. Leader: Maxine Waters
  2. Skill: Public Speaking:  I want to get better at speaking in front of crowds, but I especially want to get better at answering questions when asked on the spot.
    1. Leader:: Michelle Obama
  3. SKill: Negotiating – I want to learn to not be shy in negotiating a salary or price. I should not feel guilty, and I want to learn how to do it well.
    1. Leader: none at the moment
  4. Skill: Self – Confidence – I need to learn how to be myself, and to use confidence to best fit me. I want to show that my passion and skills can match what I show on the outside.
    1. Leader: Rihanna (I do think she is very unapologetically herself)
  5. Skill: Helping Others – I want to make sure that I take an active role in helping my community.
    1. Leslie Knope (a fictional character, but I want to be a public official, so maybe it counts?)

I am glad I was able to think of a range of different women as my role models. It gives a better insight as to why I see them as role models because I can see them doing different things. When I think of my role models I always think I like them, but I do not really think too much about why I like them.  It did take me more time to think of people who were not celebrities before, so I need to do better at looking at my role models. I also want to find more female Asian-Americans I can look up to as well. It is so important to see role models that look like you also. I hope I can be that for someone one day!


The “How”

I think of how this will impact my life is to really take time to see who my role models are. I think I need to start looking for people that pertain to that field. I think a lot of us see role models in our family or really famous people. I think though that we have to look at the professionals who are more at the local level because those are some of the best heroes, who work in day and day out with no recognition. Those should be the ones who are praised, but even without the recognition they still make change. Also, I think just having a visual representation of what we want and who we look up to really lays out what we want. This makes me want to write down physically what my goals are. It makes it more definite and real to me.


The “Why”

            First, I think we did this activity because this lets us see what our priorities and influences. We need motivation and inspiration to become an effective leader. I think people are not just born to be a leader. I think a lot of it, just like any other skill, is to learn and practice what a good leader is. We had to have learned a skill from watching someone or something else. It is important to know who your role models because you need to look up to good people. I also think that this activity was used because we need to reflect on what we want to have in our leadership skills. Also, we need to learn how to be the best combination of what our role models on. That way we can be unique to ourselves about what our leadership skills are.

Week One – Canvas Week One and Two

Empathy is difficult. It is also crucial to the progress of both science and society. It demands that we make a deliberate and consistent effort to step out of our familiar frames of reference. Only then can we synthesize different perspectives, observations, and experiences — the very act at the heart of creativity, which will be essential to solving the increasingly complex problems that beset our world.
When I first read this I thought that dark matter was going to relate to something in our everyday lives. The things we do not know everything about, like race or dark matter, we end up being afraid to learn and talk about. I think that it is important to always open the mind to all sorts of topics.
The “HOW”
I think this article talks about how we can see the world. We always need to be learning. I think that we have to learn about different topics because at the end of the day things are connected. It is naive of us to think that everyone known about life from humans are the only things that are to be understood. We need to know that there is so much that we do not know, and we need to understand we can be a little uncomfortable with that. That is because being uncomfortable helps us evolve.
The “WHY”
For the why, I think we read this because we need to see how things are connected. It showed like in chapter two that different things can spurt different inspirations. It is important to keep on learning about what we do not know about. I also think that we need to learn about one another because then we would be more aware of perspectives, unstead of being scared like what we think dark matter is.
It was interesting because he mentioned that some people think they do things because they feel it in their heart or soul, but he says that is a biological decision. If something links in our brain that we believe in it, then we do it for ourselves. It then becomes a chain reaction, and you will have people want to be a part of what you want. You will also have people that will be loyal to you. The example I liked is the one about Martin Luther King Jr, and it helped because it was someone we all know. Sinek talked about how Dr. King believed in his cause, and he had the gift to make other people believe in his issue also. The individual then makes it their own, and they ended up showing up to the talk for themselves because they believed that is what their America should be. For the most part, we all end up wanting the same thing, but the way we go about it is the great divider.

The “HOW”

Simon Sinek does this by showing visuals and graphics of his examples. He used the “Golden Circle” method where there are three circles. The biggest circles show the “what” of a situation. All companies know to show what they want to sell to you. The circle in that “what” circle is the “how” circle, which shows that only some companies know how they will sell the product. The smallest circle in both of the other circles represents “why” companies make the products they do.

Personally, the “how” in being an innovator and taking a chance is very hard for me. My parents are immigrants, and they work hard to make sure I am happy and stable. I do feel like it is my responsibility to choose a job that will help me succeed, but if I want to be a politician it is quite a gamble. My purpose to become a politician is to genuinely see what my perspective of being a woman of color and living in a community of diversity can thrive. I know many people say that politics is corrupt, and there is no use to being a politician. But it will be like that if no one tries. I need to find my “why” of changing the world. The sky is the limit as the Orville Brothers demonstrated. I want to learn and help all kinds of people, so I hope people will learn and help me.

The “WHY”

I think the purpose of watching this Ted Talk is to have a background on all the other articles we are going to read and watch. Simon talks about how companies like Apple have successful sales because they make us believe in the “why” of their product. He explains that we need to find the motivation and inspiring message that helps connect a person to your company. Simon Sinek says “people do not buy what you do, but why you do it.”

Overall, I think it talks about how we need to find the “why” in what we do in order for other people to believe in what we do. That is important to be a leader. It is important to know that firsthand, instead of trying to go out of order with the method he talks about. I need to find my “why” with the obligated classes I take and the issues I believe in. I want to become a politician one day, so I know essentially I need to sell myself. There is one way to do it by showing my stances and being a picture perfect politician. I think though if I am not passionate about what I am doing, then I cannot convince people to believe in me. It is about being genuine and passion to get you where you need to go!


The “HOW”
“Reading makes you smarter through “a larger vocabulary and more world knowledge in addition to the abstract reasoning skills.” Reading — whether Wikipedia, Michael Lewis, or Aristotle — is one of the quickest ways to acquire and assimilate new information.”
Something that they recommended to do is join a reading group, vary your reading, apply your reading to your work, and encourage others. Doing these things can really impact our lives. It is important to be reading. It is important to learn about things we do not know about. Also with technology, we can read in multiple places. It makes it a lot easier to have a wealth of information right at our grasp. I think we can even do something as little as downloading a news app on our phone.
The “WHY”
 But deep, broad reading habits are often a defining characteristic of our greatest leaders and can catalyze insight, innovation, empathy, and personal effectiveness.
I think we read this article because of finding perspective in reading books again. I remember when I was younger that I loved reading books. It made me feel so good, I want to get back to that. I like using self-motivation to help me do the things I need to do.

The “HOW”

There are the different ways to be a smart learner. One of the tips is that “smart learners question the question”. Sometimes our yearning for learning more is stunted when we are younger. I think of times when little kids keeping asking “why?” over and over again. Most of the time they are told to stop asking those questions during class to not stop the lessons. This is when they just go to the class, and the student becomes complicit. I think my college classes I have been able to do this more, but when is the line drawn. I know that there are people that play devil’s advocate, but sometimes there are times when the professor does not want that kind of conversation. I think the “how: can sometimes be difficult. A question I have is “how can we properly question the questions without seeming rude?”

One thing that I do that smart learners do is “focus on the micro while keeping the macro in mind”. I like to think of the big picture a lot, and so I think that helps me become a smart learner. I like to take a step back most of the time, and that helps me be better at my work. Another thing I like to do is “surround myself with smarter people”. I like to think that the talks and discussions I go to will help me gain more perspectives. It is important to always train your mind to listen and discuss with other people to make good decisions. I always think if the world was just a world full of me’s, then we would not have the things we have today. It was because of people building off of each other to create the civilization we have now. Who knows if the wheel would have been invented if the world was a bunch of Alyssas?!? The last thing I will use to be a smart learner is to “listen intently”. I would like the same done to me if I wanted to give valuable information, so I need to do that with other people. I need to work on this. Sometimes when I am listening to people I need to talk out loud what I heard to make sure I understood. Sometimes that messes up the thinking the other person had. I need to allow the other person to speak, so I am able to fully learn from them.

The “WHY”

Jeff Boss talks about what things smart learners do. I think we reading this article because there is always a “why” we can ask about things that we do. We do not always have to just do the status quo. I think it is important to learn more than just what is required. We will never really learn until we think about the undiscovered. It is up to us how much we want to get out of an education. It is our responsibility to be smart learners not only for ourselves but for other people. We all need to work together and to do that we need to learn about each other.


You are Not Special

The “HOW”

He portrayed his message in such an understandable and likable way. He gives statistics. In reality, over 3.2 million other students graduate from high school the same year you did. There are even over 37,000 valedictorians. He really put things into perspective. Essentially McCullough tells us that we are not the center of the universe, which is how we are taught to feel.

He tells us the things we can do. He first talks about how we know very little when we graduate high school, and it is bad to think we know everything. He says it is important to read because we owe it to ourselves to keep on learning. In that way, we will able to be the best version of ourselves. He says “to read all the time for self-respect”. He also talks about to love what you do, and believe in its importance. There is one thing to be good at things, but there is also an important part of being passionate about what you do.

I think being in the moment is so important to do. In the world of social media, it is so hard to do things without doing fun things without posting about it and thinking about how it will look like in the pictures and videos we make. I do not use social media as much, so I have been able to avoid that. What I do need to do is to not look at other people’s lives so much. I need to just live my life. The other way to be at the moment is to be selfless. I do need to let other people know how much I care about them enough, so I need to presently tell people how much I appreciate them! I would want that done to me, so I need to do it for others. That is a way we can make people feel special. Not for the accolades, but because we appreciate them in our life.

The “WHY”

David McCullough Jr gave a commencement speech about telling his high schoolers “you are not Special”. I actually read the book for this before this class, and it honestly made me feel much better about myself. I think we watched this because it gave us a perspective on what our motives should be in life. One of the biggest insecurities people have is not being good enough, and they do that by comparing themselves to other people. America has such a mentality that there can only be one great person, so we create that environment. In order to be worth something, we need to be special. We need to differentiate ourselves in order to then feel better about ourselves. It then creates a dangerous path, and happiness becomes second in deciding what to do with our lives.

Can we also note he made a joke about Donald Trump way before the time a joke like that would be so relevant?!?


“For leadership to exist, a leader must cross paths with a crisis; an exemplary person must meet her “sinister mate.”
But the ad does more than stoke fear; it also excites, because it suggests that we’ve arrived at a moment welcoming to the emergence of a strong and electrifying leader.
If we live in a world of crisis,” she continues, “we also live in a world that romanticizes crisis—that finds in it fodder for an addiction to the twenty-four-hour news cycle, multiple information streams, and constant stimulation.”
A problem emerges, a leader is selected, a goal is developed, a team is assembled, the goal is reëvaluated, and so on. From this perspective, the working life of an organization begins to look like an unending sequence of leadership events. A leader’s job is to shepherd the team through the leadership process.
The “HOW”
Although Jobs had considerable charisma, his real edge was his thoughtful involvement in every step of an unusually expansive leadership process. In an almost quantitative sense, he simply led more than others did. (It helped, of course, that he had the right traits: Jobs’s interventions worked because he was a genius.)
In Congress, though, you can vault in as a businessperson, or a veteran, or the scion of a political family. Mukunda hypothesized that, in highly filtered organizations, leaders would end up being relatively interchangeable; in less filtered organizations, individual variation will be greater. By this logic, generals, but not members of Congress, will tend to be more or less equally competent.
The “WHY”

 

Zappos

The “HOW”
The “WHY”

The “HOW”
The “WHY”

Thanks, everyone!

-Alyssa Macaranas


Week One – Chapter One Overview

Chapter 1 – Introduction: Leaders Matter

I think when discussing the topics, the first thing to do is to find its meaning. This chapter is able to see the foundation of what leadership is. The two main thoughts about leadership are that leadership is power/influence, and leaders are seen as representatives and problem solvers. I think though leaders should have a mix of both aspects.

The power perspective definition of leadership is that leaders command and influence followers to achieve group goals. The main idea is that effective leaders must persuade others to change their views to match the views of the leader. I personally do not think a good leader should be 100% this. It may work in the beginning, but later the followers will feel upset that they always must follow the leader. There will also be no growth if no other ideas are allowed.

The other side of what leadership is seeing leaders as representatives, who are leaders who best represent the values of their followers and are better at solving their followers’ problems and achieving their goals. I see myself as this type of leader. I think I work best when I feel that everyone feels appreciated and looked after. I know as a leader that I cannot coddle or babysit people because sometimes it may feel that way. The effective leaders give people the tools to be the best they can be. I need to have a better balance of both.

The next thing that I wanted to talk about is the levels of leadership. This was interesting because it said that “someone who is good at leading a small group or team may not necessarily be good at leading a large organization”. I thought this was interesting because I do not know how I would work with a bigger group than I do. One of the main values Mary Washington wants is residence life is that you are not just a number. That means we try to have personal connections with all our residents, and we are not just there to dictate the rules. I like knowing who I live near, and my job wants me to do that also. The idea of face-to-face type leadership really helps me excel. I think when the group gets bigger I get intimidated. I usually do not initiate, and so that is something I must work on if I want to be a public service official. It can really depend on what level you lead to be a good leader.

I really liked the quote from Rick Lash that said, “leadership in the twenty-first century is about leading at all levels; not restricting it to the title”. I really do believe this. I liked how it was “check your egos at the door” because what a bold statement. I like that. I want to be in public service, and so that means everyone’s matters are all important. I see the same in my jobs. When people compliment how I am as a leader I always say it is a team effort. I believe in that so much because one person can only do so much if they do not have help from others.


The “How”

As for the how this chapter is going to impact me I will see what types of leadership styles fit me. That way I can know myself more fully, and then I will be able to maximize how I am as a leader. This lesson is perfect timing because of the situation I am in now. I am a Senior Resident Assistant, and we just got an email that the building I am supposed to live in next year (Alvey Hall), will not be available for people to live in. Granted I am glad they are changing it because of the mold found in the walls, but it leaves my team in the unknown. Half of our staff was supposed to live in Alvey, and all those residents need to find new homes. I must step up as a leader, even in the summer, to see how my team is doing. We must accommodate accordingly to these changes. Also, for the how I liked how they talked about how we should have empathetic, considerate, and ethical leaders are more likely to emerge as leaders. Leaders need to want to solve problems of the world, and so leadership and ethics go hand in hand. You need both to be an effective leader. Some of the tips were very helpful as well from having a genuine concern for their well-being, and lead by using team building and a cooperative attitude.


The “Why”

I think we are learning about this because the one we need to have a foundation of what leadership is, to build on top of that idea. This way we can fully make use of the leadership characteristics in our own lives. If anything, it is going back to basics, then see how we are able to make it really work. When I read the different types of leaders I can see which one I am. Sometimes I feel like I do not want to be that kind of leader, but I should acknowledge that is how I am. That way I can work on my strengths, and I can improve my weaknesses. This shows also that a good leader can accommodate. I do see myself as a management by an exception-active leader, as opposed to management by exception- passive leader. I active leader sometime micro-manages a little too much, and they do not let the followers learn on their own. I always think that I am creating fewer problems by fixing them, but I can also work on helping people grow by being able to fix their own problem. Overall, we are reading this chapter because this initial chapter lets us know that this book will help us find our own leader identity, and we should implement the tips and information that they share! Yay chapter 1 almost done!

Week One – Carnegie 1,2,3

Hello everyone,

Here is my take on Carnegie:

Part One – Fundamental Techniques in Handling People  

When I was reading this book I was thinking of how I deal with my residents. I think being an RA to freshmen is different than being an RA for upperclassmen. When I deal with freshmen I approach the situation differently. The first principle was “don’t criticize, condemn, or complain”. In chapter one, it talks about how we should not automatically criticize people when we see them in a bad state. What really impacted me was the Confucius quote that said: “don’t complain about the snow on your neighbor’s roof when your doorstep is uncleaned”. I think that quote made me so self-aware of my place in general. I really have to practice what I preach. I remember freshmen year that I did things that were not smart (usually not law breaking like some of my fun residents), but I have grown so much since then. I have to understand that I need to be open when dealing with residents. I do not want them to feel like I am a mom. The story of the top hats feels like something people in charge of people have to deal with. Instead of nagging my residents on rules I need to change the way I say the conversation. I would want the same done to me. The chapter talks about “trying to figure out why they do what they do”.  

The second principle talks about giving honest and sincere appreciation for people. Sigmund Freud talked about one of the two things all people want is the desire to be great. I think I have always thought I was going to use my strengths to make my contribution to this world. I do have a desire to do my best. I think I really want to emulate more of what Charles Schwab did. He said, “I consider my ability to arouse enthusiasm among my people, the greatest asset I possess, and the way to develop the best that is in a person is by appreciation and encouragement”. I have seen this in action. I remember when I first was doing my job I was working hard, and with my thinking, I need to make sure I am doing my best to contribute to my staff. I like giving appreciation because I know how I feel when I get it. I also liked the quote “If I like anything, I am hearty in my approbation and lavish in my praise”. I think that I have made my best interactions and friendships with people by using sincere appreciation. That is rich. Another quote that stuck with me was every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him.” I always had the problem of being intimidated when someone was way better at me at something. If I kept that mentality I would always have low self-esteem. I realize that every person I meet will be better at me at something. I need to take that mindset into a positive one. I can learn from each person and become a better person because of it.  

The last principle is to arouse in the other person an eager want. It says that “he who can do this has the whole world with him”.  If you can convince someone that what you want is what they want they will do it. It combines self-interest with group collaboration. Henry Ford said, “if there is one secret of success it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s view”. We have to be aware of not only ourselves. We make connections when we have sympathy, and those connections become powerful. 


 Part Two – 6 Ways to Make People Like You 

The first principle is to become genuinely interested in people. I think at the beginning of high school I started to have my own revelations. It was when I was in class, and I was lost in my thoughts. The thoughts I had were all over the place, and probably thoughts that I think people would never know about me. I found it fascinating because every single person in my class was probably the same. Even the closest person you have will not know everything about you. I really then started to genuinely become interested in people. Howard Thurston said he had two things; he had the ability to put his personality through his footlights and had a genuine interest in people. He was able to become successful because of it. When people feel like someone is interested in them they will end up being interested in the person asking. The second principle is to smile. There is the Chinese saying “do not open up a shop without a smile”. For the most part, small businesses are advertised through referrals and word-of-mouth. You remember how you feel when you experienced something and may not remember what was exactly said. I remember when someone was mad or happy. If you want someone to associate your shop with positive thoughts you should smile. The third principle is to remember that a person’s name is the sweetest and most important sound in any language. It is important to remember names and make people feel important. I liked the quote “to recall a voter’s name is statesmanship. To forget is an oblivion”. This was interesting because this was a politician. I want to campaign for myself one day and starting with this now will help me gain trust for future voters. The fourth principle is to be a good listener. It is important to encourage others to talk about themselves. I do this a lot as an RA. People feel most comfortable talking about themselves because that is what they know best. My residents then feel comfortable telling me things in case something happens. I do really believe this principle works. Especially at UMW, we are all about making those personal connections, and that means taking time to get to know one another. That means listening to other people’s lives to feel like they are accepted in the community. The fifth principle is to talk in terms of other person’s interests. I know we are all in different groups, and I have noticed I do change how I interact with each group. I do not think I do it on purpose to be different, but I feel that speaking in what people are comfortable with makes the interactions the best it can be. The fifth principle says to talk in terms of the other personal interests. I also agree with talking to people that make them feel like equals. The last principle is to “make the other person feel important”. They said they can do this by “talking to people about themselves and they will listen for hours”. I have seen this happen on many occasions. I think it is when people are willing to put in the work to listen for all those hours. I think that it is needed time to connect, so I have that mindset for the most part of the conversation.  


Part Three – How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking 

The first principle is the best way to get the best of an argument to avoid it. Buddha said, “Hatred is never ended by hatred but by love”. That is what should work in theory, but it is hard for human nature. The step to distrust your first instructive impression is a really hard thing to do. It really plays with pride and self-awareness. The other step that is really interesting is to “thank your opponent sincerely for the interest”. That may sometimes come off as passive aggressive, but it would start a better conversation in the future. The quote “I may be wrong. Let’s examine the facts”. I realize that I say that I have been saying that when I have to deal with conflict. I usually say this when I have to confront someone. The second principle is to show respect for another person’s opinion. I usually think about roommate conflicts and political conversations when I think of respecting the other person’s opinion. General Lee made positive comments about a fellow officer, and the officer did not like General Lee at all. General responded to that by saying ” but the president asked my opinion of him; he did not ask his opinion of me”. I think this really encompassed the of being the bigger person. There are many perspectives of how you are perceived, but you can only control one of them. The third principle is saying that “if you wrong admit it quickly and empathetically”. The quote says “by fighting you never get enough, but by yielding you get more than you expected”. I think in order for those times when you would like people to conclude that they made a mistake I have to do the same when it happens to me. The fourth principle was to begin in a friendly way. The quote says “a door of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall”. Overall, being nice will always better the situation. The fifth principle is to get the person saying a “yes yes”, which is the Socratic method. This seems like a manipulative measure, but it also gets things done. The eleventh principle is to dramatize your ideas, and I do not think I use it that much. I do think I do that when I tell stories, in order for people to connect. The last principle is to throw down a challenge. I never saw life as that, but I think it will help! 


The “HOW”

Have you experienced this concept at work and how did it impact you?

When thinking about the “how” I thought about my job in residence life at UMW. This past semester I became a Senior Resident Assistant, so I had more responsibility than I did before. I was new at being in charge of a group of RAs and hundreds of residents. I think these simple tips are really good at learning to be a leader one bit at a time. I now see how the things I did unintentionally helped me be seen as a leader to my co-workers.

What I like to really do is give that honest and sincere appreciation to the people I work with and work for. I remember how it impacted me when someone went out of their way to show me some appreciation. I also will never forget when I was underestimated or felt left out. As a Senior Resident Assistant, I needed everyone to feel welcome and trusted. That starts with making people feel like the work they are doing is contributing. I have been making an effort to tell each of my team members that the tasks that they do really help. It only elevates the team. There was one time where I talked to a team member who was really stressed, and not working as usual. I gave her sincere appreciation for telling her it is good she is passionate and invested in our group project. She wants to have good results, and I told her that she has the support of our staff. We all just have different ways of doing it. I wanted to let her know that she was not being attacked and that she was greatly appreciated being on our staff. I think this is done with positive reinforcement. Another thing Carnegie says to do says to talk in terms of the other’s personal interests. I did this with a fellow group member, whom I realized worked in the same field as I do. We did not really know each other, but like what happens on this campus we had seen each other before. I started to talk to him about our project, but I felt like we were not on the same page. I started to bring up we were both working jobs that have commons denominator, and we bonded through that. That led us to work better with each other because we were more comfortable. We even used the experiences we had in our jobs to work on our school project. It naturally helped to talk in terms of the other’s personal interests. One thing that I need to do better on is remembering and saying the names of who I am talking to out loud. I have noticed that I pay attention more when people say my name out loud when they talk to me. I have residents on my floor that I try to say hi “insert name here”, instead of just saying hi. It makes the biggest difference for a such a small and subtle action. It makes people feel that they are differentiated from everyone else. It said in Carnegie that it is sweetest and most important word to someone.

I have noticed that I have used some of the principles, but there are also some principles I can actively use to help me be a better leader!


The “WHY”

Why did we read this book?

This book was assigned to not only how to be a successful person in a professional sense, but to also give the tips on how to be an all-around good human being. I think the point of getting a liberal education is to see the world beyond what needs to be taught in a classroom. There is a reason why some people come out on top. The business environment is seen as a dog-eat-dog world, but the people who can connect with other people is the obvious strategy for being successful. I think the book is trying to say if you put out the genuine feelings, then the same will be done to you. One of the course objectives for this class is to “increase your self-awareness and personal growth through self-administered surveys”, and this book really was a big survey of how I am as a person.

I thought this book was going to give me tips on body language or specific things to say to manipulate people into liking you, but it really was genuine stuff. It really emphasized doing the things that other people want. The quote “talking to people about themselves and they will listen for hours”. Once we get people comfortable with us, then that allows us endless amounts of opportunities with that person. I would think that I would not want to work with someone, who did not have the same respect that I do for them.  A consistent message I saw was to show appreciation for others. This is again everyone wants at one point. If we treat people the way we want to be treated, then we will also be treated in the long run the same way. I think appreciating people always elevates the situation

I think the biggest lesson I got was to make sure was to be knowledgeable about who I am. We judge and bring other people down because we are not in a good place. I think we have self-hatred, and that allows us to have an excuse to be bad towards other people. At the end of the day, we not only hurt the other person, but we hurt ourselves. I had to do a lot of self-thinking that was not always so pleasant. We always think that we are the victim, but sometimes we end up doing bad things that make other people feel bad. It is a vicious cycle if we do not act upon it. We have to take action on ourselves to make the situation the best it can be. That being said it also means saying that we are wrong, and owning up to it. That is really hard to do. Successful leaders are not the ones who think of good ideas, but the people who know how to deal with different kinds of people. This allows all people involved to stay motivated, and thus it elevates the company. Overall, the skills and knowledge I learn from the book are things I can carry into any part of my life. Life is more than just business, so we might as well make it a caring and nice environment. We just have to be good people, and the business and success will come with it.

Overall, I think that this book has a great way of describing things that everyone knows as general rules of being a good human being. I think that taking these small principles will really make adaptable and viable changes in our lives. It is one thing to be nice to people, but once we see that it benefits everyone involved it seems like the only way to go! We will be able to frame the world in ways we did not know that really affected us.  We would be able to be more of a group-oriented society compared to our individualistic society in the Western world. It would change the way the business world works. It would change the way we treat each other. It would indeed make the world better.

Talk to you all soon. Good luck this week!

-Alyssa

Final Group Vlog

Hello everyone,

We are here at the last week of classes! I think this video represents how we are doing this part of the semester. Here are some things we need to preface before you watch it.

We did our regular thing of going on canvas to create a conference, and usually, there is just a lag of getting a good internet connection. This time it happened when we were filming! I use screenscastify on google chrome. When we were filming it was starting to lag, but from my side, I could everything clearly. On the other end apparently, we were sounding like robots and transformers. This was late at night on Wednesday because we could not find another time to do this. This week really has been unexpecting, so we are proud we have been able to meet.  For one, the quality of the video is not as good as our other ones. We just made do with what happened. We decided to film to individual videos to put in the parts that were not working in the video. Maggie and Alexis were able to talk about the other parts of the discussion. There is a mixture of individual and webcam videos in this final group vlog. We apologize for the difficulty in listening and watching this video, and we hope to prevent this for the final video! Our group is glad to have this finished!

 

 

Week Fifteen (Chapters 13 and 14)

Chapter 13 – Communication and Information Technology

This chapter talks about the different types of communication. Vertical communication is the flow of information both downward and upward through the organizational chain of command. The horizontal communication is the flow of information between colleagues and peers.


Self-Assessment 13-1

This assessment has to do with listening skills.

Some of the highlights I had from this are these statements:

  • I like to listen to people talk. I encourage others to talk by showing interest, smiling, nodding, and so forth.
  • When people interrupt me when I’m doing something, I put what I was doing out of my mind and give them my complete attention.
  • When I think there is something missing from or contradictory in what someone says, I ask direct questions to get the person to explain the idea more fully.
  • When listening to other people, I try to put myself in their positions and see things from their perspective.

From these statements, I realized a few things. I realized I am more of a listener than a talker. I think people that are close to me feel comfortable telling me things. I would want to feel like someone was listening, so I hope to do the same for other people. For the people interrupting me, I would feel a little offended, but I usually do not want to cause tension. I just end up listening to them, but I remember that they interrupted me. I do not necessarily like confrontation, so sometimes I do not like asking direct questions to get the person to explain more fully. I then talked to my friends about what happened later. As I have gotten older I have gotten more confident in asking those direct questions, and I will still need to work on it. I do like learning about new perspectives, so I do find a strength in me to put myself in their positions. I do think I need to make sure I am talking to more perspectives, so I can learn more.


Why read this chapter?

I think we read this chapter because we need to know what kinds of communication should be used for different people. I know that I have to talk to my boss a different way with how I talk to my staff. It is important to not degrade anyone, and it is important to not be ingenuine with both relationships. These different types of communication help me see how I should communicate, and with who I should communicate with. I will then be able to have productive and efficient communication.


How do we use this article?

There are different types of oral communication. One of them is a face-to-face conversation, which is important for delegating tasks. Another form of communication is meetings are common today. Another use is the presentations. I am proud of the slides I create because I put the right amount of words and pictures. Another form of communication is telephone conversations. This is more effective than the email/text form of communication. The last set of communication is the voicemail. It is appropriate for sending short messages containing information that need not be in written form.

The three messaging-receiving process includes listening, analyzing, and checking understanding. We can listen to someone else by paying attention and letting the person know you have their undivided attention. For analyzing we need to make sure to do the thinking and waiting to evaluate until after listening. Lastly, as for checking understanding we can do it by paraphrasing and be watching nonverbal behavior.


Chapter 14 – Managing Control systems, Finances, and People

Skill Builder 14-2 Coaching

The skill builder in this chapter talks about how we talk to fellow employees with current performance and desired performance. There are three situations to roleplay about. As the manager, it says to feel that they were in the employee’s shoes. There would be conversations about current and desired behavior. What comes after that is the feedback.

For the first situation, I would approach it in a  non-aggressive way. I would talk about how the employee will be able to be efficient everyone needs to their part. It is protocol to only have one file on your desk, but having five will compromise the flow of the system. In order for us to do our work earlier, we need to make sure it gets done with what the bosses want. That way we all can finish.

For the second situation, I could see this happening. It is hard to when an employee is talking to people that come into the store because they can use customer experience as their excuse. I will say that just like the employee wouldn’t want to see another employee doing what could be perceived as not cleaning the table, then the employee should not do that as well.

The third situation is about the employee not putting a mat on the car, so it is important that we acknowledge that they have done great work. It is just important that they are able to show their great work, and not have it not seen if something as little as a mat not being on the floor. This is not worth seeing the great work they have done. I would also encourage that someone can help her check off all the things that they will need to do.


read this chapter?

I think we read this chapter because I needed to know the different methods to manage myself. I think I need to work on my self-control, and keeping myself accountable. It is hard to do, but I need to work on it on a professional and personal level. It is important to know when we need to measure our performance, and it is important to accommodate what we are measuring. That way we can really maximize performance. There can be things from budgets to audits, to meetings and reports.


How do we use this chapter?

One process that can be used is the control systems process. The first step is to set objectives and standards.This can be seen through the quantity and quality of the standards. The second step is the measure performance. The third step is to compare performance to standards. This means to determine if control is necessary, and how with what type. The last step is to correct and reinforce. This means to change something when it needs to be fixed, and change it in an efficient amount of time.

Another source of using this chapter is through the coaching model. The first step is the describe current performance. There is always a better way of saying things. An example is that it is one thing to say “you are picking the box wrong” and to say “there is maybe a more efficient way to pick up the box from the floor”. The second step is to describe the desired performance. The third step is the get a commitment to the change. The last step is to follow up. This is to make sure that the action will continue on. That is when things will be efficient.

Week Fourteen (Week 12)

Chapter 12 Leading with Influence

Here are the main things I learned in this chapter. The first thing was about leadership and trust. It is important to influence employees to work. CEO Warren Buffet was important to be trusted, and with the chief executive officer and board of directors, there is the decision to fire them if needed.

There are four major classifications of leadership theories.

  1. Trait Theory – attempts a list of distinctive characteristics that account for leadership effectiveness.
  2. Situation Leadership Theory – theories that attempt to determine appropriate leadership styles for particular situations.
  3. Contemporary Leadership Theories – attempts to determine how effective leaders interact with, inspire, and support followers
  4. Behavioral Leadership Theory – attempt to determine distinctive styles used by effective leaders.
    1. Two – dimensional leadership styles –
      1. Structuring – the extent to which leader take d charge to plan, organize, leader and control as the employee performs the task.
      2. Considerations – the extent to which the leader communicates to develop trust, friendship, support, and respect. This focuses on developing relationships with employees.

I think that I see considerations is more of my style than structuring. I do think I need to work on structuring, so I need to work on that.

One type of leader that I thought of are visionary leaders. Visionary leaders create an image or an organization in the future that provides directions for setting goals and developing strategic plans.I think I really need to work on this one. I like to figure out what my vision is by myself, but it is hard for me to communicate with others on what my vision is.


Case: Apple’s Leadership Transition From Steve Jobs to Tim Cook

Jobs had a notorious micromanaging of his employees and his aggressive and demanding personality Some called him temperamental, aggressive, tough, intimidating, and very demanding. Cook is a quieter leader, seems to be more thoughtful and data-driven in his decision.

I would consider both Steve Jobs and Tim Cook as leaders. They both were able to delegate tasks to their employees, and they both were able to influence what they wanted their employees to do. Jobs was a really strict leader, but people still respected him. Cook was friendlier, and so he got respect for that fact. Cook used relationship- oriented and Jobs used task-oriented as their contingency leadership style. Jobs scared his employees, and Cook encouraged them. They both were able to innovate in different ways. I see myself more as wanting to work with Cook because I grow better with encouragement, rather than being scared.


Why read this chapter?

I am learning more about myself, and I think this quote was really eye-opening.

Your job as a leader is to have a compelling vision, develop a strategy for achieving that vision, and see that everyone is working together to implement the plan.

This was really insightful to learn about how I should see myself as a leader. A leader is not just to dictate people, but leaders are also there to help the overall environment of the company. It is hard to do, so I hope I can practice more on how it works. I also think it is important to be a team player.


How do we use this chapter?

It is also important to take more assessments to see how you are as a leader. This will better help your staff know how you are, and it is good to know your strengths and weaknesses. Professor Russ Ackoff says visionary leaders try to prevent threats, no merely prepare for them, and to create opportunities not merely exploit them. I hope to be a transformational leader, who is someone to bring about continuous learning, innovation, and change. They make their followers feel like a vital part of the firm. I know how it feels to feel left out, so I think I will try to make sure everyone is included in the conversation. It is important to create genuine relationships with the people you work with in order to create a good level of respect.

Week Thirteen (Chapters 10 and 11)

Chapter 10 – Organizational Behavior: Power, Politics, Conflict, and Stress

This chapter is talking about how we think that affect our actions to succeed. It first talks about Organizational behavior, which is the study of actions that affect performance in the workplace. It is pretty evident that things that I do to myself affect the way I perform. I am not a competitive person, but the worst person that stops me from succeeding is myself. The chapter talks about self-esteem, which is an overall view of yourself. The chapter recommends focussing on your own abilities and skills and your success. Something that really hit me was the quote “forget your failures; we all have them”. I am really bad at forgetting about failures, that sometimes I forget the successes. I can change that by making room for more memories for success.

Leyla Seka said she “had to overcome her self-doubt to advance to a vice president (VP) position at a software provider Salesforce”. Lou Holtz says “Happiness is nothing more than a poor memory of the bad things that happen to us”. There are things I can control in order to do the best I can. I cannot pity myself. I have to just do things to do them, instead of thinking of what could go wrong.

Another important part of the chapter talked about personality. I did not realize my basic personality is developed by age 5. The chapter said that personality influences the types of careers we choose, such as being people oriented or task oriented. I feel like I am an internalizer, and have an average risk-taking propensity, The Big Five Personality Dimensions.

It talked about our perceptions of the things around us, and we have to keep that in mind when we are in the business world. We perceive ourselves one way, but we also hope a certain perception of ourselves is seen by others. Power is the ability to influences others’ behavior. It is important to network and builds coalitions with other people.


Chapter 10-Case: OB at College

Jefferson was going to appeal to the dean, VP, and president if Perry chooses to make a department policy that would not allow her to use her graduate assistants to test exams. Everyone is valid in their opinion, and this is a contrast of viewpoints. This is coercive power in the fact that aggressive language is being used. I think Jefferson is using her openness to experience. She sees that other professors in the country use their graduate assistants grade exams, so she does not see the problem. I do not know necessarily what I would do as Perry because there are multiple ways to make it as less conflict as possible. There are many wrong ways to do it, but I think Perry is meaning well. I think Iw ould draft a policy directly stating that graduate assistant cannot be used to grade objective exams because it would be a better even field for both professors and graduate assistants. I think that it would allow the graduate assistants to not be taken advantage of, and it would make sure that all professors so do the same amount of work.


Chap 10 Self Assessment 10-1 (IN TEXT) – Personality Profile 

  1. 5
  2. 7
  3. 5
  4. 6
  5. 4
  6. 7
  7. 3
  8. 3
  9. 5
  10. 5
  11. 5
  12. 6
  13. 4
  14. 6
  15. 3
  16. 4
  17. 7
  18. 7
  19. 5
  20. 4
  21. 4
  22. 4
  23. 4
  24. 5
  25. 6

Extroversion = 5, 7, 5, 4, 4 = 25
Agreeableness = 7, 3, 6, 7, 4  = 27
Adjustment = 5, 3, 4, 7, 4, = 23
Conscientiousness = 6, 5, 6, 5, 5 = 27
Openness to Experience = 4, 5, 3, 4, 6 = 22


Why did we read this chapter?

We read this chapter because it is another way to get to know ourselves. Our personality is a big factor in choosing what we want to do with our lives, and we can have a mix of things that make up our personality. I learned I am more evenly split between the personality types than I thought. I also realized that situations are not going to be so black-and-white. For the OB case, Perry had to make the hard decision in making an employee upset by choosing to do something that he thought would better the whole group. We need to learn how we are as people to see how we would react to those situations.

How do we do this?

One way to help with being confident in how we are is through self-talk. Self-talk means to be aware of your thoughts, stop and change to positive optimistic thoughts. The idea of visualizing your success is also commonly used along with self-talk. This is a great way to make sure that you tell yourself things will be okay. It said to not use “I” statements, so it seems more objective. I will try that.

One other thing I appreciated was seeing section on stress management. Once we find out more things about ourselves we can better know how to accommodate to how we act. Suggestions for stress management are time management, relaxation, sleep (7 hours apparently), nutrition, positive thinking, and exercise. In order to be the best we can be we have to maintain our stress, and we can overcome it with these tactics.


Chapter 11 – Motivating for High Performance

Skill Builder 11-1: Giving Praise

Imagine yourself in a management position, and write out the praise you would give to an employee for doing what you did.

Step 1. Tell the employee exactly what was done.

  • Congratulations! You have been able to successfully give a presentation to the CEO of our company. She was thoroughly impressed.

Step 2. Tell the employee why the behavior is important.

  • You were able to answer her questions, and you were confident about it. This is important because it shows that we have a stronghold in the marketing department and that she will now be able to trust us

Step 3. Stop for a moment of silence. (Count to 5 silently).

Step 4. Encourage repeat performance.

  • Thank you for all that you do. I see your hard work, and I want you to know that you are seen and appreciated.

Apply It. What did I learn from this experience? How will I use this knowledge in the future?

I think that I would want to get good feedback, so I need to do the same for others. Sometimes we get so wrapped in what we want to hear we do not take into account what others want to hear. I need to do better in making sure people feel they are appreciated. It is important to make that clear. I can make better decisions about what to do in the future.

Skill Builder 11-2: Self-Motivation

Review the two Self-Assessment exercises.

11-1 Self Assessment

I found out that motivating factors influence me more than maintenance factors.

11-2 Self Assessment

I found out that I have a combination of achievement and power as my dominant needs.


Why did we read this chapter?

When I think of the why of this chapter I think of what works for our group. We motivate each other with things like positive reinforcement and knowing how each other works. We all want motivation, but we see it in different ways. It is important to know what motivates you, but it is important to know what motivates others. IT is good to know to see what the needs of employees are, but it is also to know what the process of how people got those motivations are. This chapter helped differentiate the motivations for me to do better as well.

How do we do this?

We take these assessments to learn about what motivates us. It also lets us know what possibly motivates other people, which will help us when we need to be in charge of a team. It will give us the information to know how to effectively. Lou Holtz says there are three keys to success, attitude, positive self-esteem, and setting a higher goal. Setting a high enough goal motivates employees to push harder. Motivation is linked to group dynamics, so it will help us motivating a whole team to do what we need to do. We do that for our group in the fact that we get the stuff done that we need to, and we motivate each other to get it done! It really helps!

Week Twelve (Chapter 8 and 9)

Chapter 8 – Organizing Teamwork 

This chapter we learned about working as a team. The chapter distinguished the difference between a “group” and a “team”. A group is two or more members, with a clear leader, who performs independent jobs with individual accountability, evaluation, and rewards. A team is a  small number of members, with shared leadership who perform interdependent jobs with individual and group accountability, evaluation, and rewards. This is interesting because I am in groups with both this semester. There are designated roles in some of my groups, and for two of them, the work is just equally divided. I am not entirely sure which is better, but I do think it is important to find what is the best for the situation given. I thought the mention “Group managers are called directive leaders, and team leaders are empowering leaders” was true. I never thought of it that way, but I see what it means. Groups are meant to really get things done, and team members are more for the long haul. That means that teams need to be involved more emotionally. At least that is how I feel in some of my groups haha.


8-2 Skill Builder: Management Styles in Group Situations
Objective – To determine appropriate leadership styles in group situations.

Assess Your Preferred Team Management Style

  1. B (S)
  2. C (S)
  3. D.(S)
  4. D (S)
  5. D (S)
  6. C (S)
  7. D (S)
  8. C (S)
  9. D (S)
  10. D (S) 0 Sue hurting the member, bring sue to your office and discipline her.
  11. D (S)
  12. A(S)

Autocratic= 10 = One point
Cumulative= 3, 4, 7, 8, 11, 12 – Six points
Participate=1, 2, 5, 6, 9 = Five points
Empowerment= 0 points

I realized that my styles are really between cumulative and participate. I see myself in these roles, and I feel like I need to diversify myself in the other two styles. This will help in my communication with other team members. It is important to know that we have to adjust to the different dynamics in the different groups I am in.


Why did we read this chapter?

We read this chapter because we not only have to know how we are as individuals to be productive in a group, but we also need to know what the dynamic is in whole for a group to be motivated. There are differences between what a team is and what a group is. Job roles are shared expectations of how group members will fulfill the requirements of their position- what you do to get the job done. Group roles are the roles used through group process, which is how you interact as you work. There are different components to being in a group or team, so it is important to acknowledge that first before the work comes in.

It is also important to know what qualities are part of a good team. It says in the chapter that group cohesiveness is the extent to which members stick together. It is important to make sure everyone is on the same page, and that people are able to adapt to changes that happen within the group. Groups with the highest levels of productivity were highly cohesive and accepted management’s level of productivity. I did not really think of a concrete way of that idea for a group, but now I am glad I have a word for it! A team or group is meant to be multiple people that are cohesive enough to work as one. It is hard to do, but when it works it is great!

How do we use this chapter?

This chapter gave a few tips on how we can use this information. CEO Jeff Bezos uses the two-pizza rule” to guide team size. If it takes more than to pizzas to feed the team, it’s too big. so having five to nine members generally provides the best relationships and performance. Most of my groups is this number of people, except a group where there are eight people. It for sure is harder to coordinate things, but we will make it work. A team should really have enough where personal connections can be made. This is perfect for 4-6 members have 6-15 connections, and the most of us are good at staying in contact with five or six others. I do think this is true, and I have made sure to make sure to have a personal contact with at least one or two people in the group. That way it is harder to feel unattached, and there is a sense of accountability by doing that also.

I also learned how I can do better with how I am as a team member. I consider myself to be the silent type. I will try to participate more often. Come to meetings prepared, knowing what you want to say, and bring notes. A suggestion is to know when to stand up for your views and be assertive, trust yourself, and take risks because you and your ideas are as good as or better than others. I will take all these into account.


Chapter 9 – Human Resources Management

  • Appendix – career – a sequence of related job positions, involving increasing responsibility and increased compensation and held over a lifetime.

9-1 Self Assessment – Career Development

I took this assessment, and it was really a reality check to what I have to really do soon. Here are a few that stood out to me.

I have analyzed help-wanted ads or job descriptions and determined the most important skills I will need to get the type of full-time job I want.

  • I really have not done this as a Junior, but I know this is really the time to be starting this now. I know I want to generally want to start with a local business, then gain my connections throughout different organizations to get into Politics. It does take awhile for me to run for office, so I need to think about what I want to do before that. I have not looked at specific jobs to look for after college, and I do feel that I am behind. I plan to live with my parents after college (it is a part of my culture to live with parents until really established), and so I should look for local jobs at my home. I need to start doing that.

I understand how my strengths and skills are transferable, or how they can be used on jobs I apply for, and I can give exmaples on a resume  and in an interview.

  • I think this is really prevalent to what UMW has to offer. This school is a liberal arts college, so the point of that is to gain the skills that can be used in any job we end up getting. We learn how to work with people, and how to critically think. This helps up innovate and think of new perspectives for a new company. I can think of keywords that all people would put on their resumes, but if I do word it the right way I can really showcase the experiences I have has here at UMW.

I have a resume that is cutomized to each part-time job, summer job, or internship I apply for rather than one generic resume.

  • I do not have this. I have one resume that I use for all the jobs that I have applied for. I make my cover letter to be customizable to the job that I apply for, but I do not change my resume. I think it is smart to put the things that employers will pay attention to, as opposed to putting everything you have done. It seems during an interview it is about first impressions and glancing at the resume real quick. It should not be hard for the employer to find the clear experience and objectives about yourself. I need to work on that.

Work Application A-1

I did not realize that there was a difference between career planning and career development. Career planning is the process of setting career objectives and determining how to accomplish them. This is the “why” we do what we do. It is not like career development where it is the “how” of what we do. Here are the steps:

  • Step 1. Self-assessment – What I did in college experience is try into classes for different subjects I was interested in, and  I declared my majors by the end of my sophomore year. I am privileged to be able to do all four years of college, so I was able to try it. I knew I wanted to either create my own business and then ultimately. I know I am more comfortable one-on-one and speaking in front of people. I also know I try to be open-minded and be a good listener. I have started to be really proud of my identity, and I do feel my place is to represent and serve others. I know people think politicians become corrupt, and they ask me why I want to be one. I realize that we still have to try.
  • Step 2. Career Preferences – This is what motivates me. What really hit me was that when I tell people that I want to be a politician they usually say “wow I did not expect you to want to be one?”. There is for sure a deeper implication to that. People that look and act like me are barely represented in government, so I want to help change that norm.
    • What industry do you want to work in: Government, Public Service
    • What size organization you want to work for: State government
    • What types of jobs you want in your career, which functional areas interest you: Government, Business (Human Relations, Management, Economics)
    • What State: Virginia
    • How much income you expect when you start your career: This is what I need to find out. Public office does not pay too much unless you are one of the top leaders in state government.
      • Virginia House of Delegates Yearly Salary: $17,640
  • Step 3. Career Objectives –
    • Short Range – Work in small businesses, do internships in Northern Virginia, Participates in campaigning
    • Long Range – Run for a local council, work my way up to State Delegate, and then Senator or Governor
  • Step 4. Plan
    • Connections- It is important to build those connections around my town, and then build my networking. Sadly, politicians have to think about image, and not entirely on their experience. I know I limit what I put on social media, but I do need to go into the community more to gain those connections.
  • Step 5. Control – I will solidify my options, and I will see what is the best way to make sure I get my goals done. I am not sure what is the best way to run for office, so I will have to know it is my own journey to find the way.

What are career development efforts that you making?

I am going to intern at the local political party office for both sides and see how both sides work. I am also going to work with a local business soon to learn the ins and outs of how that works.

Work Applications A-2 –  What specific ideas on getting a job do you plan to use? Identify the five steps in the networking process. 

I am planning on using is the “jobs while searching”. I think that is interesting. I have heard of some of my friends becoming substitute teachers, and I think I could do that as extra income.

Work Application A-3 Create your one-minute self-sell.

One minute self-sell is an opening statement used in networking that quickly summarizes your history and career plan and asks a question.

  • History – Hello my name is Alyssa Macaranas. I am a Junior at the University of Mary Washington double majoring in Business Administration and American Studies, and I will graduate in May 2019. I am working as a Senior Resident Assistant in Residence Life.
  • Questions – I am seeking to work with a small business, and I also want to work on a political campaign.
  • Plans – Are there any particular positions that you think I could thrive in with the skills I learned in my degrees?

Why did we read this chapter?

We read this chapter because it was another avenue for self- assessment. I am getting very close to being in the process of applying for jobs, and I realized I did not even know the difference between career planning and career development. I know I what kind of jobs I would be interested, but I need help to show employers the passion I would want for those jobs. It is hard to convey what you want in a job interview because it is more than just wanting the job. It is important to learn about the different things I need to take into account when applying for a job. I do need to get a clean-up up of my resume. I need to also personalize my documents for each job that I will apply for.

How do we use this chapter?

I used this chapter with help on my one-minute self-sell, my resume, and to really think of what my goals are. I can go to the career services to get started, and I need to start now with my career planning. I need to learn about my preferences when it comes to jobs, and what I want in the next five years. I think that actually facing what I want to do helped me face a reality that I was afraid to approach with no direction. I think going through the self-assessment has really helped me narrow what I want to do. I need to get customized resume, and I need to start looking at job ads. Here is to adulthood!