Yah Sahs! – Hello in Greek
I think this post is long overdue. I feel like my past few posts I have gotten into a funk. I have not put in a deep post in awhile. I feel like my past posts were there to have a post for the day. I did not feel what I was writing. I did not get my quota of long rants. I have a lot to show you, so let us talk about things that are overdue.
Not like the book that I turned in. Ha. Ha. Wow a joke.
By the way people do not know if I am telling a joke or telling the truth. I cannot really pull off a sarcastic tone, but I will try to work on that. Anyways before I talk about the funk I think I am going to let us talk about gospel choir!
On Saturday for an event for Black History Month I went to GospelFest. It was a program where different gospel groups sang and preformed. I have never been to a church or a place where I saw a gospel choir. I was excited and curious about it. The majority of the audience was African American. As soon as it started people started to sing along. I felt this tingly feeling in me. I did not know what it was at first. I think it was just pure joy and happiness. Everyone who sang and danced felt so happy and in the moment. I learned the words as I went along, and I felt that there was a connection amongst us all. I cannot quite describe it. It was interesting seeing a different section of Christianity. Overall, we all believe the same thing. I was with my friend who was not Christian, and she enjoyed it. I think overall the message was not about telling what God does, but the awareness of the connection we all have. God is there to unite us and not seperate us. There is a reason why we were all created differently. It was not a day of a certain faith, but a day of happiness. It was great!
I wanted to bring up another thing. I usually go to these diversity events. I have gone to the American Indian month, Latinos Identities Month, Asian month, etc. Almost every time I am the only person of my ethnicity and race there. I am the minority in general at my college, but I do not think that is the problem. I think the problem is that people from other backgrounds are not coming to these things. I have learned so much, and I have enjoyed so much from these experiences.
Especially in a time where race is so prevalent in the U.S. we need to be educated. The keynote speaker I saw tonight was named Rasheed Cromwell. He talked to us about the topic Black Lives Matter. I think what struck me the most was that he said we are not born to hate. We are taught it. It made me think of things in my past. I cannot relate to the specific problems that African Americans have, but I see the general commonalities.
There are the micro-agressions that have occured throughout my life. I have gotten experiences that I will never forget. People in my culture, like most Asian countries, think the whiter the better. People bleach their skin. Unlike in the U.S. being pale means staying in and being richer. I do not think many people say this out loud, but Filipino women are encouraged to marry a white man. It is because in their mind mixed babies are the best looking. They will end up white. They will have the image of a white person, so indirectly they think do not marry darker. My family does not think this way, but it is the norm. I was not explicitly told to marry someone because of their color thank goodness for my family.
I have not always recognized that my immediate family has really wanted the best for me. I know they want the best for me, but sometimes that can get blind-sided with what they want for me. I have had arguments where I have been stubborn and frustrated with my family on what I should do in the future, or when things should happen for me. I ignored what really mattered. My family is not in the sense close-minded to what is out there for me. My parents do not care who I marry, as long as I love that person and that person treats me right. They just want me to be happy. They want me to do what I love, so I can live a happy life. I am tearing up a little just thinking about that. So many people have had their family try to cut off who they are as a person because of their viewpoint. Even if my family and I do not see eye-to-eye they understand. I really like about myself that I am open to new things, and I could not have done that without them. I do not give them enought credit where credit is due.
Random: Bruno Mars and Beyonce slayed the Super Bowl.
Lastly, I would like to say that I am getting into some kind of funk. I think this blog has helped me so much. I just think in the natural course of things I just seemed to go through a loop. I have lost a little focus in what I want to do. I want to do my best in school, but I think I have not. I feel me going back to Junior year, but it is different. I am working out. I am going to classes. I am living somewhat productively, but I just lost the motivation. Overall, I am content with things. I do not have a certain problem, but I just feel not in balance.
I think the best way to explain it is that I am in airplane mode. I am on cruise control. I am doing what I am doing, but not necessarily on the way to a certain thing. I think once I get things finalized like my RA stuff, my internship application, and all the required stuff I will get a little better. I have not been the best on sleep, so do not worry I will soon. I am hanging in there!
Have a good day! Thank you for reading. 🙂