February 21, 2016 | 10:45 p.m.

Well, I said I was going to write when I have something to talk about. I guess I do. That was pretty quick. I guess let us dive right into it…under the sea.

My sister Ariele! Hehe get the reference. My dad decided to spell her name like that, so you can’t blame her. Fun fact: my sister got her name after my parents watched their first movie together The Little Mermaid. How adorable! She gets a lot of awwwsss when that story is told.

Anyways off to talk about my sister. Right now, my sister is at a KPOP concert for EXO. I did not know that much about KPOP culture, but she has a liking towards it. I get updated a lot on it. I respect things that she likes, and she respects mine. Tacos and purple for life! I am really happy for her. My parents drove 4 hours to bring my sister to the concert. This is her birthday gift. She is turning 17 on the 26th. Wow. My sister is turning 17. Sometimes I forget how old she is, but I have good reason. She is very smart and mature for her age. I mean she is book-smart for sure, but she also has the perfect blend of street smarts and childish creativity.

I go back to a time when I was able to go back home. My sister and I were the only young ones at the party, and we went back to the time where the only people we could talk to other than our family was each other. We joke about how we would be in a corner talking to past the time away. The times before phones and electronics to keep us company. The things we had to talk about it. The times where we only had each other as entertainment. It has been so long since we have just been able to talk to each other without any distractions. Now I am not at home, and when I am we are each doing our own thing. We check up on each other, but it is not the same as before. I used to think it was a bad thing, but it is now another stage of our relationship.

Okay back to the story. We talk and joke, and then we hit a different note. I talk to her about this blog, and the things I have done to figure out more about myself. I tell her what I have learned. I have learned very little about life, but enough how I can be in my life right now. She tells me she wishes that I am happy. I was taken aback. We show our love by joking around and making fun of each other before. It seemed that the loud music and the talking in the background silenced. We could hear each other loud and clear. I started to get all fuzzy inside. I now think about it, and I start to tear up. My little sister is wishing the best for me. She thinks about me even in her busy life. She takes the time to pray for me.

I am the big sister. I am the one who should be doing that for her. I look at her, and I see so much. I see how much she has grown, and how she is so much wiser than her years. I sometimes feel I am not the big sister she deserves. She helps me so much, and I only wish I can do as much for her.

Her persistence and work ethic is impeccable. She gets things done early. She disciplines herself. She gets work done. We could not be more different haha. I procrastinate. She saw me not do my work in high school, but she still kept on going. She is so determined. She is so bright. I am so blessed to have a sister like her.

Anyways again back to the story. During that night I do not think we reached such a deep level like that really ever. A totally spontaneous moment where we both connected. That is what life is about. I look back at all the times I struggled with my feelings, and I would never open up. I hope she knows she can come to me with anything. I never want her to feel the ache I do, but I know it will happen to her like it happens to all of us. She will learn things on her own. She will go through all the ups and the downs. I do know that my family will be behind her 100%.

I remember the time when I was obliged to do certain academic things to go into a certain field. I was so mad and hurt and emotional and guilty and unhappy. I would automatically think of my sister, and all those feelings I had were going to be put on her. I had to do something. My sister and I are always going to be a team. I am glad I have her on my side of the ring. We strategize, and we are always there for each other. We are not like usual sisters who take multiple photos with each other and steal each other’s clothes…well most of the time. We do our own thing, but when we need support we are there for each other.

I know she is probably going through some stuff that people our age go through, so I am glad we are getting to a point where we can talk about that stuff. Sometimes we are compared, but so much of my success is influenced by her and my family. They all work hard, and I am in such awe of it.

I cannot believe she is going to be 17. I cannot believe I am going to be 19. Age is but a number because my sister and I are not our ages at all. For example, my friends were going to a party, but I just chose not to. They said I was going to miss a good experience, but honestly I do not need it. What I have learned is to not judge the ones who do. So party when you want to as long as you are safe and having fun! They are living the life they want to.

I think her and I have the idea of wanting to make our family proud. We both cried at the video about immigrants and their kids. I do not want her to feel like we are disappointing them. I want her to find her place in this world and to be happy. I know I have to work on myself to show her a good example, even though she is already her own good example. I want to make her proud.

She is turning 17 in less than a week. I wish her a happy and self-discovering year. I am always there for her.

Thank you for reading this! I hope you all have a wonderful day.

-Alyssa

 

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